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When it comes to infidelity in relationships, there’s always the question of why.
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Why would someone cheat?
That’s often followed by more questions: What did I do to deserve this? How did it take me so long to realize what was going on? Who are they cheating with?
Ashley Madison recently profiled what a typical cheater looks like by examining the attributes of a typical member of the dating site.
The findings are particularly worrisome because a typical cheater is basically just like everyone else — your neighbour, your co-worker, the average parent on your local PTA.
The site surveyed more than 2,500 of its members and identified 13 signs that may increase the likelihood of someone cheating in a relationship based on their profession, astrological sign, personality traits and what their family life is like.
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The survey found that the top professions among male cheaters are tradespeople, workers in the tech sector, engineers, sales managers and construction workers with an average income of $72,000.
Meanwhile, women who are unfaithful are medical assistants and nurses, teachers or professors, marketing and PR specialists, stay-at-home parents or those who work in a trade or the tech industry and have an average income of $62,000.
If you’ve ever wondered if cheating is in the stars, most of the male respondents were Leos, Aries, Cancers, Scorpios and Geminis, while non-monogamous women are Sagittarius, Cancers, Aries, Libras and Taurus.
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When it comes to the type of affair they’re looking to have, 82% of respondents said they were looking for more than just a fling.
The site’s members revealed they have had an average of one to two affair partners, but more women than men reported having more than two affair partners.
“When people are looking to cheat, they pick one of two kinds of partners — either someone exactly like them or someone whose personality seems totally opposite to their own,” said Tammy Nelson, a sex and relationship therapist and author of Open Monogamy.
“Finding someone with a different temperament and background can be intriguing and exciting.
“Meanwhile, someone with similar traits can feel familiar, which can make it more comfortable if someone is nervous or unsure about starting an affair.”
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As far as personalities go, 54% of male respondents and 47% of women surveyed said they identified as an extrovert, while the majority of members reported being the eldest child in their family.
When it comes to the family lives of members, the majority of respondents have children, which are the reason they stay in a lacklustre marriage.
About half (46%) of members indicated that while their relationship is unfulfilling, it was still tolerable.
In fact, 36% said they were happy with their marriage, which conflicts with the common belief that affairs happen in unhappy and turbulent relationships.
Nearly a fifth (19%) of those surveyed have been with their spouse for 21 years or longer.
Unsurprisingly, the main catalyst for infidelity is boredom in a long-term relationship.
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