A diagnosed narcissistic sociopath has revealed the twisted things she enjoys that would disgust most people.
The woman, who goes by the name Delta, shared a video about her struggles after realizing she thrives on feeling intense hate and rage, knowing that the average person should despise the reactions.
A narcissistic sociopath is someone who lacks remorse, is manipulative and has a sense of entitlement.
‘I lack specific emotions, like empathy and remorse, and a lot of my other emotions are pretty dull,’ Delta explained.
‘I think I enjoy emotions like being full of hate and rage because they’re intense, they feel real.’
She added that rage and hate give her stimulation to ‘alive in a world where I typically don’t really feel much of anything.’
‘This is why I like confrontation, why I seek out fights with other people, why I engage in risky behavior,’ Delta said.
A narcissistic sociopath explained that she feels and enjoys hatred and anger in a way that normal people don’t. These feelings help alleviate all the other emotions like empathy that make her feel less human
Delta uses TikTok to share her experience diagnosed narcissistic sociopath, while helping people protect themselves against from tactics used by those with the disorder.
Her latest clip focused on how she learned her emotions are likely not the same as the average person.
‘I generally did not know that most people do not like feeling hate and rage,’ she said.
Delta also revealed that she also suffers with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD), a mental health condition that causes harmful behaviors without remorse, which is a symptom of her diagnoses.
People with ASPD gain satisfaction out of exploiting others and often have no problem hurting them due to a lack of remorse or guilt, according to VeryWellMind.
‘For me, my ASPD blocks out and blunts a lot of my emotions,’ said Delta while noting she does not feel empathy or remorse.
Unlike most people who feel fulfilled by desire and happiness, such emotions leave an empty void for her.
‘[They] are very quick passing or dulled, and don’t necessary feel real. They’re more superficial,’ she explained.
Individuals with ASPD can be ruthless, attacking others who oppose them.
But the opposition can feel like a game to people with the disorder, providing a stimulation in life.
While Delta claimed she isn’t 100 percent devoid of emotion, anger and hatred prevents her from ‘seeking out adrenaline and stimulation.’
When that happens, ‘it largely translates over to wanting to make people angry, to feel rage, to hate people,’ she said.
‘Anything that brings me a sense of adrenaline in any type of way is something that I see I can go after.’
It is in part the power and control she feels behind strong emotions like hatred that makes it so appealing.
A narcissistic sociopath’s main goal is obtaining control over others which allows them to fulfil their fantasies of superiority and power, according to Simply Psychology.
‘For most people, emotions like hate and anger seem to be something that causes them distress, that doesn’t feel good to them – those emotions feel good to me,’ Delta said.
‘I like feeling them and I seek them.’
In a separate video, Delta explained that she suffers from adulthood trauma including poverty, being institutionalized and severe anxiety, and that these experiences worsened the condition which she claimed had been there since childhood.
She has also previously said her past experiences may have contributed to her diagnosis and claimed she was sex trafficked for years by the time she was 10 years old and was allegedly raped frequently.
‘Out of all the emotions that I do feel, anger is one that I experience the most intensely,’ Delta said in her new video.
‘I don’t have any issues with feeling anger, and so I think that because it brings me a sense of stimulation, it helps my boredom and it allows me to feel real and human.’