If you’re in a long-term relationship, chances are that you find yourself having the ‘where are we going for Christmas’ conversation every year with both sides of the family hoping to get to spend the big day with you and your partner.
For one woman, though, the choice to stay at her parents came at quite a price.
Writing on Reddit, the unnamed 21 year old said that she was hoping to bring her partner back for Christmas to spend it was her family but as the family home is a part-time AirBnb property, her mum has asked for ’200 bucks’ a night, for a maximum of two nights.
This was on the premise that the boyfriend would be using up a room that could otherwise be rented out so the poster suggested that he just stays in her room because, “I don’t think it’s reasonable to charge him money when I’m the one who suggested he spend it with us, but she said he couldn’t do that, because he needs to pay if he wants to be with me?
“She says this time she’s not going to let someone be with me without paying. So I asked her, if he pays, can we stay in the same room? And she said no.”
The poster added that she was tempted to tell her mum that if the two can’t come home, without charge, she simply wouldn’t go back.
Should parents charge their children’s partners to stay over?
In what is a rare turnout for Reddit, all of the comments were in agreement: don’t go home or, if you do, don’t take your boyfriend because he will not be having a good time there regardless.
User lookingreadingreddit said, “That is awful. Try and see your siblings but don’t, whatever you do, pay for your boyfriend as your mum will make it a recurring thing. Really awful and not what Christmas is about. Probably worth talking to all the people who would be missing out on your company and explaining why. Sorry op.”
Caroline Leaf, a cognitive neuroscientist and author says that when it comes to welcoming your children’s partners to the family, it’s best to let your child set the pace.
“Show interest in their partner, but at a level that keeps your child comfortable. You don’t want to get so close to your child’s partner that they question your loyalty or make your child feel as if they are disappointing you if they want to end the relationship,” she says, adding, “show them lots of love and acceptance.”
….Which we assume doesn’t include charging them £200 a night to stay over.